Real Housewives of Potomac recap: Think horses, not zebras

In the words of the esteemed founder of the arts and sciences of reality television, Brian Moylan, most of the fights on Housewives aren’t actually about what the ladies talk about on camera, but are actually about the show and the power struggles over what goes on behind the scenes, i.e. compensation. When the girls closed in on Denise Richards beverly Hills, A large part of that was due to the seven-figure salary she was barely earning while filming. the Atlanta The ladies turned on Kim Zolciak once she got too big for her pants and thought she got on a gravy train with her husband in the NFL and the franchise. The hierarchy that income represents is understood as a subtext for those who are smart (or curious enough) to understand the maze of blind spots, questionable Instagram stories, and thinly veiled tweets from glam team acolytes to make sense of when you’re the ladies Married to medicine Engaging in seasonal four-way humiliation rituals, this is not the case Alone Because she’s insufferable and annoyingly dramatic, but also because she sets clear boundaries between her coworkers on the show and her friends in real life.

Since I’m incorrigibly curious, I can generally instantly recognize what the subtext of any scene is about — I’ve probably already listened to the obscure podcast posted in the recesses of the official subreddit months ago — I’m primed to understand the actual tension playing out on screen. For example, at the Potomac premiere it was clear that Stacy was admonishing Kiarna with the phrase “You’ve been trying to come for years.” They’re both trying to stand out, and Kiarna realizes that Stacey’s star is rising while hers is waning—Stacey expresses her desperation to get a moment on camera by creating tension between them. It’s cheeky but fairly straightforward. But this episode… I have no idea what the actual problem is between these women, if anything.

I’ll go from most to least understandable. Stacey doesn’t take a hit on her lying down and enlists Jacy to get revenge on her. Stacy has every right to want to respond, but I have to say her acting was worse then Cynthia was forced to expose Mr. Chocolate. However, Jacy appears to be down for the tag team, and oh and coo appropriately when it is revealed that – Drum roll, please -Giselle is dating. If they wanted to return fire, they would have to act even more forcefully.

Then we have Wendy versus Kierna. I get the gist of Keiarna’s problem: she wants them to be legitimate friends, and Wendy and K see her as work friends, which isn’t enough for her. She doesn’t want to do the fake double kiss on occasion; She wants true friendship, sisterhood, and connectedness…but that’s not what Wendy offers. Explaining the complexities of tensions between women and ways to use passive-aggressive tactics is close to the requirements and an advanced degree in sociology, so I’m not entirely surprised that Kiarna becomes flustered by Wendy’s deadpan energy; But she has to know that she simply isn’t communicating her case well at all, and Wendy won’t give her any rope beyond the exact amount she needs to hang herself. Wendy laughed in Kiarna’s face, and they raised their middle fingers at each other, and yet they walked out of that scene hugging each other – I would need 10,000 words to explain how that referred to the emotionally volatile behavior of the women who dominated their group conversations, angry at each other.

While I more or less understand the gist of the above issues, when the horses start coming, it all makes sense. First, there’s tension over two competing events between Keiarna and Wendy, except that Keiarna is having a pre-party at the apartment, and Wendy is hosting a formal party at the race, so there’s really no conflict at all. Afterwards, the chin check issue is revived, except now Giselle is angry because Angel said Keiarna doubled again, and Angel claims she’ll get in serious trouble if she lies. So then Keiarna’s police say that, and Angel looks happy as a clam, and now Wendy and Gizelle are upset with her because she’s not mad at Keiarna, and now Keiarna is mad at everyone in her apartment? I really don’t understand what we’re supposed to care about here or why. I understand that Angel was hesitant to call out her best friend in front of the crew, but most people wouldn’t jump to dragging their best friend in front of an audience. I just have a hard time understanding why the phrase “chin check” is such a problem that it has to be constantly dragged out like this; It’s starting to remind me of how we spent an entire season discussing the connotations of the word “violation.” Beverly Hills.

By the time Stacey and Kiarna recounted their argument, I was simply completely lost as to what everyone’s problem with each other was. Stacey isn’t invited to Keiarna’s functions, Keiarna doesn’t care, and Stacey reminds her of the physical altercation they had, and I’m just wondering why it’s all getting so hostile. Now we’re piled into the truck, Angel’s having a problem with Wendy, and I’m stuck, wondering how the word “chinliner” caused all of this. Usually the alliances and subtext are pretty clear – this time, it felt like Kiarna was trying hard to establish her rightful place at the table, and everyone was enduring friendly fire as a result of her half-hearted efforts.

Anyway, the logos have finally arrived. Let’s rate them, shall we?

This episode was probably more confusing than the third act of a Chris Nolan movie, but we’re about to take the cast to St. Kitts and Nevis, where we can at least get confused while gazing on the beach. See you all next week!

• I laughed out loud when Giselle politely informed Angel that her sound bowl event was extremely boring. I’m sorry, but I’ve seen enough bogus meditation procedures for the next four lifetimes.

I’m actually surprised at how little I miss Mia on my screen, but I’m hoping that she and Bobby Valentino (or whatever mystery man in the Atlanta area was relevant 15 years ago that I’ve looked up to now) are doing well.

Stacey being a beauty pageant mom is as predictable as Kenya Moore’s colorful connections. But Arabella looked cute!

Ashley looked beyond absurd doing a class with a melted wig and a full face of makeup. Just sprinkle a little powder, fill in your brows and voila!